The Power of Keeping Promises to Yourself
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We think the big promises are the ones that matter. The ones we make to our kids, clients, our teams.
But what really matters are the little promises we make and then break to ourselves E.V.E.R.Y. D.A.Y.
I'll get up early tomorrow to work out.
I'll ask for that promotion.
I’m done with sugar.
No more social media after 6 PM.
And then we don’t.
We tell ourselves it’s not a big deal. That we’ll start again Monday. That we were tired or stressed or just didn’t feel like it. And that’s fine. Life is life. But it becomes dangerous when it becomes habitual.
Every time I broke a promise to myself, I told the Universe I wasn’t ready for it: My future. My highest potential. Happiness. Impact. Success. Ease. All of it.
Instead, I told myself:
I’ll start once things calm down.
I’ll focus on my health after I take care of everything else.
Networking can wait—this deadline/kid/client needs me now.
Once they get what they need, then I can focus on what I really want.
I was sending the signal to my inner-self and the entire planet that it was ok to put ME on the back burner.
I’d say to myself:
I’m going to wake up early and workout.
I’m finally going to take care of my body.
Today, I’ll take that first step to move that dream from my journal into the world.
But, I didn’t follow through.
Not because I didn’t want it—but because I hadn’t yet decided that I was the priority.
And that being the priority wasn't selfish.
They may seem small one-off put-offs, but they’re not. They’re micro-hits to my self-worth and integrity. And out of alignment with my future self.
Broken promises have a double whammy. Not just one, but a double W.H.A.M.M.Y!
Each time you say one thing and do another, you send yourself mixed messages—and it shows up in your results or lack of there of.
When you break a promise to yourself, you don’t move forward, don’t achieve, don’t feel that amazing feeling that would make you better and was important to you, your life, your business.
When you break promises to yourself enough times, you stop believing you’ll follow through. You stop trusting yourself with big dreams. You lose credibility with yourself—and your confidence suffers. Giving the flywheel of broken promises even more momentum.
That’s the first whammy.
The second whammy:
All of the thoughts of blame that come after a broken promise.
You "should" on yourself.
I should have…
I could have...
Should-ing by another name is blame. You blame yourself for not following through, which wreaks havoc on your self-esteem. The mind drama from getting distracted and letting that commitment get derailed takes up so much space.
Here’s what shifted everything for me:
I started keeping my word to me.
Small promises. Kept daily.
I became a safe space for my own desires.
This is what I call a new way of being for high performing leaders.
And the moment I did, I started moving differently.
My confidence didn’t spike because I achieved a goal.
It spiked because I trusted myself to show up no matter what.
You need to remember who you are—and begin acting like she matters.
Here’s another reason -- I believe the most important of all.
When you keep promises to yourself, you are the role model for others who need to see it for themselves. I want to role model for my kids what it looks like when you keep promises to yourself, so that they, in turn, keep their promises to themselves.
So today, make just one promise to yourself.
Make it sacred. Make it simple. And keep it.
Then watch what unfolds.
It’s just waiting for you to become the person who keeps her word to herself.
I made a promise to myself this summer to have more fun, experience more experiences and this one was unreal: Mercer Labs in NYC
📓 Journal Prompts for the Week Ahead
If everybody wins when I play big, then…..
I trust myself to take care of myself when....
I am willing to commit to my goal by doing ___________ by __________(date).
What does my team, family, friends need from ME to be their best?
What am I ready to ask for — unapologetically?
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