High Performing Leaders Don’t React, They Respond

🎧🎧 Listen to Sunday Sunshine HERE 🎧🎧

I remember at Fast Company in the midst of a potentially transformative new digital initiative roll-out, I was at the end of my rope. Our Editor & Chief was relentless: Every email he sent was push back. His numbers were incorrect, he was missing the context and next steps were never clear. He drove me crazy with each and every interaction.

Has that every happened to you?

Frustration rises. And then...

Your fingers hit the keyboard.

You type fast, sharp, fueled by irritation.

You want to prove your point.

You want to be right.

You want them to feel your frustration.

I know this because this is how I reacted each and every time his email hit my inbox.

That’s reacting.

Driven by ego.

Fueled by anger.

Impatient.

It’s you on auto-pilot.

We’ve all been there.

But YOU don’t ever have to be there again.

What if you took a breath and asked yourself: What’s the outcome I actually want here?

It’s not to be right ever. That’s ego talking. Ego doesn’t get you the outcome you want. Proving them wrong never delivers on your ultimate goal.

Instead, pause.

And,

Shift from reacting to responding.

In my coaching, I help high performing leaders see that every result in their life comes from action — and every action comes from a thought.

The meaning we give a situation drives how we show up.

When you react, you let your unchecked thoughts and emotions lead.

When you respond, you reclaim your agency and choose a thought that allows you to lead with intention, influence, and impact.

The Difference

• Reacting is automatic.
  ​Responding is intentional.

• Reacting satisfies ego in the moment.
  Responding serves connection for the long term.

• Reacting gives away your power.
  ​Responding reclaims it.

• Reacting mirrors what’s thrown at you.
  ​Responding reflects who you want to be.

• Reacting closes options.
  ​Responding opens them.

The Leadership Lesson

Your pause is your power.

That single beat between stimulus and action is where agency lives.

It’s where you choose whether to send the email that burns bridges…
…or the one that builds them.

It’s where you decide whether to be led by ego…
or to lead with impact.

This is the same principle I share with high achievers who are rethinking success and identity. True growth comes when you align who you are with how you show up.

Closing / Call to Action

This week, notice the moment between the trigger and your action.

That’s where leadership and transformation happen.

That’s where you decide:

Am I reacting… or responding?

Because at the end of the day: Reacting costs you. Responding grows you.

📓 Journal Prompts for the Week Ahead

1. When you are retelling the stories of your life what will you say?

2. What are my top three values today? Do they align with the life I say I want?

3. What’s something I’m sick of hearing myself say, over and over? Like, “I really need to start…” “I really need to stop…” “For real, this week I will…”